Women..

I had the chance to attend a focus group session on the financial awareness of indian women aged 40 and above, as a documentor. Though intially i went into this cos i was coerced by my cousin, i came out of it glad with a new perspective on life.. This because the focus grp i was a part of was a group divorcees, employed or self-employed. It made me realise how fortunate I am, and how the choices we make in life determine the direction our life takes.

51 year old, emotionally strong, pretty, has a son who's 30 now. Husband left her when her son was just born. She braced the stormy waters and is now an independent, successful woman (successful by my standards, though that is highly subjective) who is debt-free and has investments and plans for the near future.

Hers was a love marriage. Being born in a wealthy family, she moved out to marry the first (and only) love of her life. She led a very poor life, all for the sake of her husband who brought her nothing but unhappiness. Highly suspicious, with a strong case of inferiority complex, he brought other women home, tortured her emotionally and physically even when she was pregnant. When the baby was born, he deserted her and left, leaving her alone in the rental flat with no one to turn to.

She attemped suicide and wanted to kill the baby too, didnt have the heart and survived, coming out stronger. She went to work, puting on a happy, normal facade amidst the tragic life she led, didnt believe in taking loans or having debts and single handedly raised her 30 year old son, who has a good education and a job now. She never let him feel inferior to those from happy families. The heart of a mum and the strength of a mother. amazing.

46 years old, 22 years of being a homemaker, now struggling to keep a shop going in tekka. aspires to train and develop the talents in the younger generation who do nt have academic qualifications. after 22 years of marriage, and dependency and trust on her man, she realised he had another woman. Is now going through divorce and fighting for custody of her 2 children aged 17 and 20 who are with the father, who is btw, fithy rich with a swimming pool etc in their home. I just pray god give her strength and show her a way out. She spoke abt hw there were days when she had to struggle with no money for even food.

50 years old, completed her diploma at 46 so she could take a better job. and single handedly raising her son who is 17, and a very promising student and son. She is fortunate to be blessed with such a son and vice versa. Lost her husband to a woman who 'helped to settle some financial problems they had'.

Before the 3 of them walked out of the room that day, they hugged me tight and told me thank you for listening. They asked me to be strong. These women, all affected in one way or other, shared their stories cos they wanted to provide strength to the one who was going through the divorce. They wanted her to be strong and not break down the way they did initally.

That day, i learnt about the strength of a woman. About hw optimism is everyting. Wat u tink is wat ur life becomes.

and also the true meaning of inna lillahi wa inna ilaihi raajiuun. HE gave it to you, and HE can take it away at anytime. AND HE has every right to.

To all women out there, this stories are not meant to instill fear that men will not be faithful in the long run. But rather, regardless of what life throws your way, you have to come out on top and be strong. We may be weaker physically, but HE sure has given us emotional strength that will enable us to tide through everything.

And of cos, ALWAYS save for a rainy day. You never know when a need arises.